Return to Regularly Scheduled Program

We went a little long with our International Maritime Satire Week – according to my wife I’m apparently I’m “not allowed to blog on our anniversary.” In any case we are returning you to your regularly scheduled, non-satirical NextWar Blog, but first wanted to recap our twitter feed (@CIMSEC) of headlines you might not have seen:

- SECNAV Reintroduces Grog in the US Navy:http://goo.gl/nDGu7

- Autobiography Reveals Alfred T. Mahan Spent Nights Secretly Writing “Twilight” Fan Fiction

- CNO Introduces Equal Opportunity Red Teams: http://goo.gl/hk5SF

- Following Success of Shipboard Breathalyzers, SECNAV Introduces New Parental Chaperone Program

- UAV Weds Topgun Instructor

Pentagon Announces Sequestration Scenario for Navyhttp://goo.gl/BMC1N

- General Atomics Partners with Cyberdyne for New T-800 Drone

- US Joins UNCLOS; Washington Immediately Seized by UN Forces

US Navy Introduces New LCS Mission Packages: http://goo.gl/Wn8Qs

- Sign-up now for winter Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps-Navy Photoshop Seminars!

- Xinhua Oped Says Great Barrier Reef a Sacred and Integral Part of China

- Iranian Navy Plans to Alleviate Burden of Global Maritime Responsibilities from US http://goo.gl/nDXKP

- New Somalia National Government Developing a Bailout Package for Failing Piracy Industry

- Admiral’s Staff Completes PowerPoint Magnum Opus – To Be Performed at 1630 Brief.

- Sneak Preview of CNO’s US Navy Birthday Message: “Antarctica Will be Ours!”

IRGCN Admiral says Iranian Navy Plans to Patrol US Great Salt Lake

- Mothership Tours and Skiff Rides at Somali Piracy Week: http://goo.gl/8RnRm

North Korea Loses 4 Patrol Boats in Skirmish with South Along Border, Declares “Glorious Unparalleled Victory”

- US Navy to Power Great Blue Fleet with Unobtainium

- Chinese name second aircraft carrier “Panda Express”

Putin Announces New, Innovative Naval Policy: Build Massive Navy: http://goo.gl/Goh6b 

- US Navy CO Fired to Meet Navy Times Quota

- MQ-8B Fire Scout Spends Crew Rest Dominating Friends on X-Box

- Pakistan Says Claims Osama Bin Laden Found in Abottabad “Insultingly Untrue”

- Spain Says Iran Has Secret Vintner Tech, Crossing Red Wine Line; Ahmejinedad Threatens to Close Strait of Gibraltar

- President Deploys US 10th Fleet to Cyberspace: http://goo.gl/zxEzJ